We’re still having summer weather here in Houston. It was 99 degrees today and that is after a “cool” front blew in! So we’re OK to continue to wind down with this summer series.

It’s time now to move toward the solution. But let’s review what we’ve covered so far:

• The Relationship Master: A relationship master is someone who can sustain positive, authentic, effective interactions with people through whom they must conduct business in order to achieve desired outcomes.
• The Emotional Side of Business:Leaders are often not aware of or prepared to deal with the emotional, reactive side of business. There is an emotional “force field” in all organizations that can pull leaders toward reactivity instead of thoughtful response.
• Common Reactive Behaviors: Typical reactive responses in the work place (and elsewhere) are: anger, aggression, explosive behaviors, conflict aversion, gossip, over and under functioning and excessive togetherness.
• Reactive Behaviors Stymie Effective Professional Relationships These reactive behaviors 1) can become our prevalent way of operating and, 2) can hinder effective relationships.
• The Challenge is to Take Responsibility to Manage Your Own Reactive Behaviors

As leaders, we sometimes have the tendency to think that if our employees, peers or boss could just get their act together then all will be well. It’s the other person who has to change!

As the leader, your first step is to take responsibility for yourself and your overall wellbeing. It’s sometimes called self-mastery, self-care or self-leadership.

And what does this have to do with relationships? A lot! I know that this may seem like a digression, but it’s not. If you come to work each day tired, sluggish, guilty (i.e. for not working out) and unfulfilled in other areas of life, your ability to engage and maintain effective working relationships is significantly hindered. It’s just common sense and something that we all know.

Take Responsibility to Manage Your Overall Well-Being

• Exercise: Start with something you, at least, kind of like and build on that. This is a definite growth process….small steps are healthy.
• Diet: You are what you eat. Just look in peoples’ shopping carts. I say that as kindly as possible, but it’s true.
• Rest and Vacations: Americans take less vacation than any other Western nation; we don’t know how to rest. Take all of the vacation that is offered to you. And find some times during the week or weekend to just chill…even for a moment.
• Hobbies: I have found that some clients are depriving themselves of these real enjoyments. When they engage in neglected hobbies, they seem to be more satisfied in other areas of life such as work.
• Spiritual Activities: Minimally, meditation and other spiritual practices can be very rejuvenating and fulfilling; now there’s even much science behind this.

Any one of these activities has distinct physiological and psychological benefits and can lower your overall stress level; we all know this. Bottom line….either you believe that these are important and you’re going to make time for one or more of these or you’re not. Tip: virtually, the only way to get something like this done is to schedule it. Research shows that after 30 days or so of consistent activity it has the potential to become a habit that you like and stick with.

Your physical, emotional and spiritual well-being is the foundation for healthy, productive relationships. It starts with you!